January 15, 2004.

I am in the hospital. This freak keeps coming in and out of the room. His goggles are sooooo 1970! Well, it’s too bad that I’m here. You want to know why? Huh? Do ya? Okay.

Well, I was making cookies for my angry little sister (who was mad because… okay that’s another story) and she demanded chocolate chip cookies. Well, my older brother (who has been arrested many times, but you don’t need to know that) came into the house because he ran away from jail and shoved me in the freezer for no good reason.

I must stop writing.

I am cold.

Too cold…

Okay. I have regained my strength to continue my tragic story.

Well, my sister called the ambulance and didn’t think to get me out of the freezer! I am glad for the ambulance though. Real glad.

Oh yes, and my brother is back in jail. I think they need to put him in solitary confinement.

April 1, 2006.

I have been taken away by the poison control people. Yes, poison control. My older brother has escaped from jail again (I am guessing they didn’t put him in solitary confinement…) although he did not cause this tragic accident. My mom has this special shelf of toxic cleaners, and my sister was looking for the best April fool’s joke ever. I just know she looked there.

My little sister always puts my cereal and grape juice on the table in the morning and I’m guessing she used the toxic carpet cleaner.

The poison control person keeps peering over at me to see if I am okay.

Geez! I’m okay! Gosh, I wasn’t that poisoned…

Okay maybe I was.

Now my sister is in jail too.

(This story was based on this picture: My View by Heather)